Make me pretty loopy. I have been going between Demerol and Ultracet, and there doesn't seem to be much difference between the two.
Thankfully the surgery went well, and the procedure was the "easiest" version that the doctor had outlined. It was pretty quick, only about half an hour. I woke up screaming my head off though. The pain was completely unbearable. The last thing I remember was laying down on the table and the anesthesiologist putting drugs in my IV, and then I woke up in agony. Agony is an understatement. The amount of pain I had was completely indescribable. This was the third worst amount of pain I've had. (It's crazy that I have a running list: the first was waking up from hip surgery in September; the second was when they were doing the surgery on the abscess - both times since the damn resident buggered it up the first time - and didn't put me under). When I woke up and was hysterical they asked if I wanted my mother to come in, and she did. She's amazing, I don't know how she stayed so calm and level-headed when I was losing it completely. Thankfully after what seemed like much begging and pleading and pleading and begging they gave me a shot of Demerol. After a few minutes that finally kicked in, and though the pain was still bad at least my mind didn't seem to care much anymore.
They let me stay there for about half an hour and then pretty much kicked me out, telling me I'd be more comfortable at home. I just wanted more shots of Demerol but they wouldn't give me that. The doctor did give me a script for some Demerol tabs though. I don't remember much about Friday, but what I do was a nightmare. When I first got home I passed out on my bed from the sheer exhaustion of being in that much pain + the pain killers. When I woke up I had to go to the bathroom, and was pretty nervous. I was able to pee but I also saw all this blood on the gauze and it freaked me out as it was bright red. This was the first time I actually realised how they literally taped up my behind with gauze. I was nervous about the blood so my mother said I should call the doctors office. They were not very helpful and just kept repeating that I only needed to call if the pain was very bad (I wonder what they consider v. bad since I was in agony???), if I was bleeding more than normal (again - how was I meant to know what "normal" was for this) and if I couldn't pee. I also asked, as my stomach seemed to be getting a little upset, what I should do if I felt I had to have a bm. The guy said to just take off the gauze and tape and go. Ok, so long as he said it was fine.
My mother wanted me to eat something because I hadn't all day, so I went in to the kitchen to see if I could and all of a sudden my bum decided it was incontinent and let loose. This was pretty gross as I still had that taped gauze all over. What a mess, to say the least. I was pretty upset, not just about the mess, but since incontinence is something that can happen with this surgery. I was so glad my father was out when this happened. I thought all was well, washed up and did a sitz bath and got changed. All for naught it seemed as it happened again. I couldn't believe it. It was probably a good thing I was high on painkillers as otherwise I'd have been freaking out completely. Finally my insides decided to give it a rest and I was able to get sorted out and back in bed. Such fun stuff I tell you! After that I don't remember much. My mother made dinner and I had to go to the table to eat. This required lots of pillows under me. I don't know how I made it through, but went straight back to bed afterwards. Unfortunately I didn't sleep very well and was up all night from the pain. (the last two paragraphs were written later but I wanted to add them so that anyone who goes through this might know what to expect)
Yesterday was a little better than today. I finally slept a little last night but this morning was in agony, probably because I hadn't taken a pain tablet since last night. I'm still pretty out of it from the drugs now, so this might not even make sense.
People don't realise that even if you're loopy and in pain you can be bored out of your mind! Thankfully my mother had been a great sport playing monopoly and scrabble with me to keep my mind occupied. There is only so much bad telly you can watch. I would also like to that my friends for their support before and after, it means so much to me to have that. It seems a little thing perhaps, but when you're going in for surgery it's nice to get that and afterwards it is great to have people call. I guess if you've never been through this stuff you don't realise the importance of what a little phone call can do.
Hopefully I will be going back to work on Tuesday, but I will see how I am tomorrow. Sitting is still incredibly difficult at the moment - I'm not sitting now, just kneeling on the floor.
Ok, room is starting to spin again so going to go lay down.
