not as bad...

as last time. Thankfully! This is what they looked like on Friday night,

and then on Saturday. They got a bit gooey but thankfully nothing like the last batch. I really hope that is it! I am tired of the itching! Thankfully they are practically all gone today.

Even though I went out yesterday to watch the football match, and knew I was going to be indoors, I put bug repellant on my legs, just in case. I'm going to have to stock up on that stuff now. Hopefully I can find something that works that is not full of all the poisonous chemicals though. I will do a search today.

Getting back to hip related items...
My right hip has not been to happy lately. I think it's from a combination of leaning on my right side so much because of surgery (yes, my bum is still killing me when I sit on it), and last week I forgot to take my Mobic. Well, didn't really forget, but was afraid to take it too soon after surgery as I didn't know if it would make me bleed more. I started it again yesterday, so we will see how that goes. Dr. Aronoff's office rang this morning to cancel my post-op on Thursday. The woman first said she would give me an appointment the week after, and when I expressed my concern about waiting and really wanting to see him this week, she got all snipish. I know it's Monday morning, but come on. Finally she conceded and got me in for Wednesday. It was strange, they're usually very nice there.

I haven't really slept the last two nights so hoping I can sleep tonight! Well, at least it's a short week this week!

I must be really sweet...

because the bugs seem to love me. I woke up this morning to 9 new bites! This is what my left leg looks like so far. I am really hoping that they don't get bad like the ones a few weeks ago. I can't deal with that again. It's strange because this doesn't usually happen more than once a spring/summer. I guess I am not allowed to sit outside ever again. :-(


Other than that, my bum is killing me, and I'm just trying to get through the day with a currently grouchy boss. TGIF!!! I need a rest!

mixed

It's been a mixed day - I booked some great theatre and concert tickets, which I am v. excited about. I'm such a theatre addict, most of my money goes that way. The other is diverted to books, books and more books. I suppose we all have our obsessions. I'm reading a great book about Elizabeth Wydeville now, that sets a lot of the propaganda against her straight. Almost finished so have to decided what will be next. Also hoping that the weather is good for the concert in the park on the 15th. I hated having to miss it this past Tuesday, so fingers crossed the weather is just as nice!!! (Please, please, please!)

The downside is my bum is killing me. All this sitting! My one boss is out of town and the other took a v. long lunch, so I went into one of the offices and just laid on my stomach reading for an half hour or so. It felt so good to take a break. Besides dealing with a cranky person here at the moment, the other thing getting to me is when people can't just say what they mean and be direct? Is it truly necessary to play games? That has to be one of my top pet peeves. If you are done, say so! Argh!

Now that I've vented, I'm much better.

Off in half an hour. Going home to soak and then out for drinks with my friend :-)

Missing the everyday

I made it to work today! Even though I was an hour and a half late, I still made it, and that is what counts. I don't think I could have taken another day sitting at my flat, no matter how much pain I'm in. I've cut out the pain tablets as I'm so done with feeling wonky and dizzy and sick to my stomach. I'm just on Tylenol now. It helps, but I still feel pretty weak. I took the bus and subway this morning. I had to wait for a bit, and there was a taxi in front of the stop, and for one second I thought I'd take it, but then I came to my senses and realised what a nightmare that would be, with all the bumps and potholes! I had left a pillow at work from the last surgery and glad I did. My bum definitely needs it. My bosses have been v. understanding, I'm v. lucky with that.

So, here I sit, at the office, still feeling like crap but really wanting to get back to my regular life. (But I do miss all of my mother's yummy home cooking!). I hate boredom and being cooped up, so time to make some plans! Well, not bike riding or anything, but something to get me out and about.

(Again, just want to say how amazing my family and friends are. Even when they are busy packing and then about to hop on a plane to S.A. find time to check in, or so busy with their three kids and birthday parties, ring me to say hi, and those that just have v. busy single lives and still find time to check in regularly. I hope you all know how much I appreciate you! It does mean the world to me, and I just want to say thank you!)

Good news are my bug bites are all gone and no more itching!!! (I probably just jinxed myself).
Bad news is that we've been through about 3 or 4 fishes in the last week. Martin died over a week ago, I got a replacement, and in two days he was gone, so brought him back to the shop, and they gave me a new one. That happened two more times over the last 5 days. I went in yesterday to tell them the latest had that cotton-like fuzz on it and they then mentioned something about air conditioning, and if it had been on. Seems that Bettas are v. sensitive to water temp and even if they're not near the a/c, it can cool the water, then bacteria or fungus grows, and then they're a goner. Wish someone had said something sooner. It does make sense though because Martin had been doing fine until the air was turned on. I think I will wait until the fall to get a new one! I can't take anymore dead fish!

boredom and general icky-ness

Yesterday was quite a day. I had brecky with my parents, then passed out on the couch for an hour or so. I had taken a pain pill when I ate and I guess it hit me pretty hard. It's definitely true that these things build up in your system, because the more I took, the quicker the effect was. When I woke up I took a shower and my mother wanted me to try to walk outside. We went pretty close, just to the food store, but I felt really queasy and dizzy and was wiped out by they time we returned. I ate again because we thought that might help, and then I fell asleep for a few hours. In the interim they had left. I was woken up around 19.30 by the phone and thought that I should eat something. I tried to look at some menus online but still felt ill, so just had a little cantaloupe that was cut up. I tried to sit in the other room for a while but just felt horrid so came back to bed and eventually fell asleep, on and off, for the night. I am glad that I didn't go to work today because I would have been a wreck.

This morning I still felt horrible, even though it had been about 24 hours since I had taken a pain pill! I decided last night that no matter how much pain I was in I was just going to take Tylenol because I hated the haze I was in. After I took a shower this morning and still felt ill, I thought some fresh air might help, so went across the street to Starbucks, where they have outdoor seats (I brought my own cushion - and it was still pretty painful). I was out there for an hour or so and it seemed to help a little. Then it started raining - just my luck. So I came home, ordered some lunch, and made myself eat. Since then just been vegging on the couch, trying to sit on my bum, and feel less sick. I think some of the meds are finally leaving my body. I truly hate feeling like this, like I've no control over my body.

I have to say this is a pretty horrible recovery and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. I can't begin to describe the pain. I have decided I am going to go to work tomorrow and am hoping to make it through the day, with just Tylenol - at least that's the goal. I am beyond bored. It's dull just sitting around with no company, so at least there I will (hopefully) have things to do. I am really bummed (no pun intended) that I will be missing the concert in the park tonight - it's perfect weather! Oh well. C'est la vie.

Pain, drugs, boredom and lack of sleep

Make me pretty loopy. I have been going between Demerol and Ultracet, and there doesn't seem to be much difference between the two.

Thankfully the surgery went well, and the procedure was the "easiest" version that the doctor had outlined. It was pretty quick, only about half an hour. I woke up screaming my head off though. The pain was completely unbearable. The last thing I remember was laying down on the table and the anesthesiologist putting drugs in my IV, and then I woke up in agony. Agony is an understatement. The amount of pain I had was completely indescribable. This was the third worst amount of pain I've had. (It's crazy that I have a running list: the first was waking up from hip surgery in September; the second was when they were doing the surgery on the abscess - both times since the damn resident buggered it up the first time - and didn't put me under). When I woke up and was hysterical they asked if I wanted my mother to come in, and she did. She's amazing, I don't know how she stayed so calm and level-headed when I was losing it completely. Thankfully after what seemed like much begging and pleading and pleading and begging they gave me a shot of Demerol. After a few minutes that finally kicked in, and though the pain was still bad at least my mind didn't seem to care much anymore.

They let me stay there for about half an hour and then pretty much kicked me out, telling me I'd be more comfortable at home. I just wanted more shots of Demerol but they wouldn't give me that. The doctor did give me a script for some Demerol tabs though. I don't remember much about Friday, but what I do was a nightmare. When I first got home I passed out on my bed from the sheer exhaustion of being in that much pain + the pain killers. When I woke up I had to go to the bathroom, and was pretty nervous. I was able to pee but I also saw all this blood on the gauze and it freaked me out as it was bright red. This was the first time I actually realised how they literally taped up my behind with gauze. I was nervous about the blood so my mother said I should call the doctors office. They were not very helpful and just kept repeating that I only needed to call if the pain was very bad (I wonder what they consider v. bad since I was in agony???), if I was bleeding more than normal (again - how was I meant to know what "normal" was for this) and if I couldn't pee. I also asked, as my stomach seemed to be getting a little upset, what I should do if I felt I had to have a bm. The guy said to just take off the gauze and tape and go. Ok, so long as he said it was fine.

My mother wanted me to eat something because I hadn't all day, so I went in to the kitchen to see if I could and all of a sudden my bum decided it was incontinent and let loose. This was pretty gross as I still had that taped gauze all over. What a mess, to say the least. I was pretty upset, not just about the mess, but since incontinence is something that can happen with this surgery. I was so glad my father was out when this happened. I thought all was well, washed up and did a sitz bath and got changed. All for naught it seemed as it happened again. I couldn't believe it. It was probably a good thing I was high on painkillers as otherwise I'd have been freaking out completely. Finally my insides decided to give it a rest and I was able to get sorted out and back in bed. Such fun stuff I tell you! After that I don't remember much. My mother made dinner and I had to go to the table to eat. This required lots of pillows under me. I don't know how I made it through, but went straight back to bed afterwards. Unfortunately I didn't sleep very well and was up all night from the pain. (the last two paragraphs were written later but I wanted to add them so that anyone who goes through this might know what to expect)

Yesterday was a little better than today. I finally slept a little last night but this morning was in agony, probably because I hadn't taken a pain tablet since last night. I'm still pretty out of it from the drugs now, so this might not even make sense.

People don't realise that even if you're loopy and in pain you can be bored out of your mind! Thankfully my mother had been a great sport playing monopoly and scrabble with me to keep my mind occupied. There is only so much bad telly you can watch. I would also like to that my friends for their support before and after, it means so much to me to have that. It seems a little thing perhaps, but when you're going in for surgery it's nice to get that and afterwards it is great to have people call. I guess if you've never been through this stuff you don't realise the importance of what a little phone call can do.

Hopefully I will be going back to work on Tuesday, but I will see how I am tomorrow. Sitting is still incredibly difficult at the moment - I'm not sitting now, just kneeling on the floor.

Ok, room is starting to spin again so going to go lay down.

Dread

Well, the bites have plateaued. Not much better but at least not worse. Thankfully they're not too itchy though. I'm so glad it was cool this week because I've had to wear trousers to cover them up. Other than that I'm pretty stressed about tomorrows surgery. I think it is worse when you know how much pain you're going to be in. I am just praying it all goes well and is the simplest procedure of all (touch wood, poo poo, fingers crossed, etc.) I've been in so much pain the last couple of days that I don't even have the desire to put it off any longer.

My parents are coming in tonight so they can come tomorrow. I don't know what I'd do with my mother, she's just such a trooper when it comes to taking care of me after all of these lovely medical things. So now just have to get through sitting today (ouch!) and thankfully I have the chiro and massage at lunch.

May go to the pool after work but it depends on how I'm feeling. My tummy has been pretty wonky all week, I think from the stress. The hip has been holding up okay. I walked all the way home from work on Tuesday and it was pretty good. I can't believe it's taken this long to get there though - 9 months. And I still haven't heard back from my second appeal for PT from the state. I really hope I do get some visits approved so I can see how the hip is doing and what I can do to move forward though.

Walking Hazard Zone

Well, I have to say I am a walking hazard zone. Sunday afternoon my left leg was itching and I saw I had a bug bite. It seemed normal so I just ignored it. A few hours later when my parents arrived, I had numerous bites and some were starting to really swell up. I can only think I got them at the park (a concrete one mind you) before I went (indoor) swimming on Saturday, or perhaps Saturday night as the doors were open at the bar I was at, though nighttime doesn't seem like a big time for mosquitoes to be out. Anyway, I ended up not sleeping at all on Sunday because my legs were so itchy I was debating ripping the skin off of them. By Monday, the bites had gotten pretty big and were swelling up my ankles and feet. I rang the doctor, who was not in, so there went that idea. The nice pharmacist across the street told me to use Benadryl at night and a cream that has an antihistamine in it during the day. I found that helped more than the cortisone I had been spraying. Witch hazel also seemed to help a bit.

This is what the biggest bite looked like on Monday (my inside right leg):



Monday night I took two Benadryl and went to bed by 9pm. I woke up once around 2am, but thankfully fell back to sleep pretty quickly. Tuesday morning I woke up to this lovely picture (same bite as in last pic):


It's lovely, I know. I've been wearing trousers all week because I have a few that look this red, though thankfully they're not all this big. I am documenting this because for the last few summers I get bites out of nowhere, they get all icky and gooey, and seem to get infected immediately. This all started after my trip to Egypt in 2005. I was eaten alive there by bugs and ever since, about once a spring/summer, I get bites like this, and then (touch wood) it doesn't happen again until the next year. The first time it happened I woke up with huge bumps all over my legs, and had such a big bite by my ankle that I couldn't even bend my ankle properly and had trouble walking. I went to the emergency room that time, and the doctors were all stumped. They thought it might have been spider bites, and even drew circles around the infected bites. If the bites got bigger I was to go back to the ER. I didn't want to so ended up going to my regular doctor. She also was shocked. No one seems to know why this happens. My own personal theory - and granted there is no factual basis for it - is that the Egyptian bugs poisoned me and now I am really allergic to the American bugs. It doesn't make sense but it's the only thing I can think of, as I can't recall this ever happening beforehand, and especially not on an annual basis.

Here is what it looks like today (same spot), thankfully they seem to be improving. My motto is definitely "never a dull (medical) moment!" :-/

More swimming

I went to the pool yesterday and did about 15 laps of just swimming. I was trying to walk in between but my current injury was hurting when I did that, so I just did the laps. After the last two my right hip started to act up so I decided to not push it and just stopped. But I am v. happy to report that I was not suffering for it, so far that is. Hopefully it will keep up.

Swimming

I skipped the pool on Wednesday as I felt I would definitely be putting myself at risk to overdue it all. I did go for a pretty long walk after work though, so at least got some exercise in.
Yesterday I went to the heated pool on 34th, and I had it all to myself! It was so nice. After I did my regular walking and exercises, I decided to try some swimming. My mother was funny when I told her this - she said "Did they say you could?". My response was "WHO?". Since the insurance co has not let me have PT and I have not seen Dr. Kelly for a few months, I decided to take matters into my own hands. For better or worse. I was good, only did a few test laps with all the different strokes, and (touch wood) all seemed to go well. No popping or clicking or dislocating or subluxating that I could notice. And I can still walk today!!! My shoulders are not happy but they've been bothering me since I started doing arm exercises in the pool anyway. If I am still feeling like this tomorrow perhaps I will try a little more, though I still want to be cautious. It would be nice to be re-evaluated so I know what I should and shouldn't be doing though.
Perhaps the insurance gods will grace me with a positive answer to continue in the near future! Dare I hope???

3 days in a row

And I'm debating about going to the pool again tonight, but I have a feeling if I do that might be pushing me over the edge. I am sore today, so perhaps I do need a break? I'll have to see how I feel later.

Pool time

I went to the pool again yesterday. I am trying to make up for the last four weeks of not going, and then the few weeks I probably won't want to go after surgery. I am going to go again tonight. Thankfully my hips have been feeling pretty good with it. The right was acting up a bit when I was doing the sideways walking towards the end of my workout, but other than that (touch wood) it all seems good.

My right hand is not happy though, even with sleeping with the splint, but granted, it's only been a couple of days since I started that again.

Weekend and 38 wk post-op update

I suppose it would help if I remembered to take those bloody Mobic pills! Last night I was lying in bed, wondering why my hips hurt so much. Yes I over did it this weekend, but they were really achy. Then I realised I hadn't taken a pill all weekend, possibly even including Friday. Oops. What's that saying, G-d helps those that help themselves? I have been pretty good except for the last few days, and yes I just took one now after my brecky.

My lovely wound had been behaving for a couple of days and then yesterday I woke up and it was bleeding a lot. I won't gross you out, but it was a gross day dealing with it. Even so I took my lazy bum to the pool. I figured I would do a test run to see if I would be able to do this after surgery, since the doctor said it should be okay. It felt great to exercise and be back in the pool - it's been 4 weeks and I definitely need to keep up my muscles in my legs. I don't want any backsliding with my hip "progress". I did a little over half an hour, then got kicked out because there was some kiddie party.

My right hand/wrist has been a wreck lately, but did sleep with the splint last night so hopefully it will make some sort of difference for the better. I really can't possibly think about hand surgery right now with everything else going on! 11 days till surgery. Ugh.

update

I'm loving Dr. A. He said that all looks ok and I didn't need to have anything done. He also said he was glad I called him b/c I should always do that so he can check it out. Much better attitude than most dr's. He said he'd be happy to do the colonoscopy if the other dr's wanted it but I said I wasn't really in any state and he felt it wasn't a necessity so I am putting it off for now. Only time will tell if that is the right decision, but I do feel like it is. He doesn't think that anything would show up as well to change the course of treatment.

As for my right hip, I love those lido patches! They fix me right up. Of course the left got jealous and wanted one so started to act up but I've done a fair job of ignoring it today and tonight.

Dr. A also answered my q's about anesthesia (not general - woo hoo!) and wound size (not as big as I had started to imagine) so I felt much better after our convo today.

So all in all I haven't felt this happy in a few months! I know I still have to have the surgery but Dr. A seems very competent and positive about it so I'm going with that! (touch wood)

I could get into how bad my right hand/wrist has been but why ruin a good post? :-)

consultations

After speaking to Dr. A yesterday, I tried ringing my internist Dr. Rosen. She was out so I sent her an email. I love technology. She rang me back this morning. It's good to have a doctor you know for so long and knows all your intricacies. She doesn't feel I should necessarily have the colonoscopy before since there is an infection to begin with, so that was good news and I'm happy to go with that theory. I really wasn't in the mood to have to go through that right now as well.
I also had asked her about my previous colonoscopy. I couldn't remember when it was, but it was way back in 1994! Another good thing about keeping the same doctor, they have all your records! It showed a little inflammation (colitis) but was non-specific and not something anyone was concerned with. I had been going through a lot then and having tons of tests so she wasn't thinking it meant much, even in hindsight. That' a relief. I am totally stressing about going to Dr. A's later though.

On a hip note, I've done a lot of walking the last four days and today my right hip is telling me to stop it. But still, it's a lot more then I've done in a long time, so I'm looking at it as progress. :-)

PS- I've just decided I'm throwing on a lido patch on the right hip - I can't deal with anymore pain!!!

Answer

Just spoke to Dr Aranoff and he said since there's still an abscess I have to come in for him to drain it and possibly put a clamp on it??? I have no idea what that means. Tomorrow at 11.45 is the designated time. He says it will be quick and I can come back to work after, and it needs to be done as he couldn't do the fistulotomy until it is cleared up anyway (he hadn't mentioned that before), so I don't have a choice -what else is new!?!

Also he said that since my drs want me to have a colonoscopy, that I should maybe do it b/f the surgery too. I will discuss that with him tomorrow but am not looking forward to that prospect.
Have I mentioned how much fun it is to be me lately???

?'s

After my dr's appointment last night, I have a list of questions to ask Dr. Aranoff about the upcoming surgery. My dr. wants me to see if he would do a colonoscopy at the same time, so I wouldn't have to be put out twice. I don't know if I'm up for this, but I will ask. She and my internist want to discover why this all happened.

I also wanted to ask some other q's re: anesthesia, wound care, etc. My dr. wanted me to tell him also that the abscess is about the size of a cherry now and not oozing much as the current wound is almost completely healed over. So I really don't have a clue if I will be making it till the 20th or going in sooner. I did just realise that Dr. A is out of the office today so I won't hear back till tomorrow. Fun fun fun.

At least I slept last night, I love those klonopins! First time I've slept through the night since I can remember. I knew the weather was going to be crap today so felt like I should at least get some sleep. Still pretty groggy though. Thankfully it's dead at the office so I don't have to worry. Tomorrow & Friday the big guys are in so it will be much busier.

37 weeks post-op

Has it really been that long? Mind-boggling, truly.

Yesterday I walked all the way home. I was definitely feeling it on the way but kept it up. I'm a bit sore today but not as bad as I thought I would be, v. happy about that.

I haven't had a chance to go to the pool yet, but am thinking that I will do that tomorrow. I really want to get in some exercise before I have to have the next surgery on the 20th. I know the doctor said I can go in the water afterwards but I'm not sure how I will feel so would like to get some pool time in now, just in case.

I had to change my appointment with Dr. Kelly that was on the 27th June back to the 18 July. It was the first appointment he had available in a time I could manage. I didn't think going to his office a week after I have the surgery would be good, since he likes bending my legs and hips all over the place. Trying to put off as much pain inducing actions as possible :-)

My bum is still not happy but I'm trying to get through the next 2+ weeks as the doctor had said it would be better to wait a bit. Hopefully (touch wood) I will be able to manage it.

Did get a letter regarding the insurance appeal, and it's in the works. Fingers crossed that I can at least go back to PT for a bit to see what my real strength is and what I should and shouldn't be doing. I know bike riding is not in the near future, but that's not because of my hip!