M.I.A.

Yes I've been MIA for quite some time now. From mid-August till the beginning of September I was in my own world. I just didn't have the energy to deal with everything going on. I will give a quick recap for the past few weeks:

18-24 August: went to pool 3x that week, and cut my hair off. I needed a change in so many ways, and that one was the easiest! Then again, I didn't really have much of a say. Avi, my hairdresser, decided I was long overdue, and well, there is no arguing with him. That weekend I was out pre-celebrating my birthday, which I overdid - way too much. You don't realise how that sangria hits you until it's too too late. Had an appointment with Dr. A, to check my wound - he said it was ok but the day before it didn't look so ok.

25-31 August: was good again and did pool 3x. Continued to celebrate within reason for the most part, until the weekend. Oops. I did do some samba dancing though which I thought was quite impressive for my hip. The hip let me enjoy myself for a bit and then decided it was time to sit back down. But still, no long term suffering which was a v. good thing.

1-7 September: pool 2x that week. Yet another appointment with Dr. A to check the wound that would not heal. He says it was doing okay, even though I was in more pain than I had been in for a few weeks (not counting the cauterization).

8-14 September: Big accomplishment - I biked from my flat to BB&B, which is a little over 2 miles. I was very proud of the hip, it held up quite nicely, even with a few inclines that were on First Ave. Pool again 3x.

15-21 September: Pool only 2x this week. I had to go to the dentist to have a crown made for my last root canal, the one that went horribly wrong. Yes, it was almost a year ago, but after all that agony I was quite happy to not have anyone muck up my mouth again. It was agony and then I had to stay for a cleaning as well. Thankfully I took half a pain pill beforehand so that helped a little bit. My TMJ was a mess for the week after, and still is a bit now come to think of it.

22-28 September: very bad - didn't go to the pool all week. To be fair, Thursday night I had a pretty bad onset of my FMS and by the weekend was almost completely bed/couch bound. Between my exhaustion and stress and the weather I felt absolutely dreadful. I did somehow manage to pull it together enough to make challah on Sunday though. Not quite sure how I pulled that off, but I was determined.

29-30 September - 5 October: pool 2x this week. It was difficult with all the running around back and forth to the island for the holidays, and then again on the weekend for the dentist. I had my crown fitted and also decided to get a night guard as my teeth seem to be catching the brunt of my nighttime grinding. Hopefully this one will be better than the one I had ages ago and it will do some good. It sure costs enough! But to add to the excitement of the holiday, during shul on Tuesday I started to feel icky. I thought my tummy had gone off so went to the loo, but it wasn't that. To spare you the details, the short of it is I had a surprise UTI. I can't remember the last time I had one, so was pretty flipped out when I started to see blood. Thankfully my sister in law knew what to do and sorted me out until I was able to see the doctor the next day. Yes I had a bad UTI and had to go on a major dose of antibiotics. Oh joy!

As for this week so far, it's been pretty icky. Yesterday I had a visit with a neurologist, Dr. Fatimi. When I had my physical a few weeks back, my doctor recommended me to one so we could check out all this tingling/pins and needles down my right arm/hand and the twitching in my left finger. She decided I needed an MRI for my neck and an EMG test. For those not familiar, please see the video below. I'm still not convinced after watching it that it isn't more painful than they are portraying, but that's because I do not trust anyone in the medical profession anymore after all of the pain they've inflicted on me. But hey, that's just me.



EMG NCS test

Currently the doctor thinks I might have carpal tunnel. I've thought I've had that for a while, but the pain I've been having daily for the last few months feels different than that, so we shall see. (As a side note, my right hand by the thumb area has been killing me the last couple of weeks. The injection that Dr. Melone gave me definitely wore off. I know he said that I would need surgery if the injection didn't last, and not sure if I should do that now or wait. I am going to see what the EMG study shows first about carpal tunnel and then make an appointment to see him. He said it would be an easy surgery compared to what I've had in the past, but I need more detailed information on that.) The doctor was pretty young and I am not sure I am that keen about her, but I will give it a little time. Then again, whenever I meet a doctor they usually think I'm barmy because of the multitude of issues I have. It's hard to find a good doctor that has a clue. Anyway, she said that if I do have carpal tunnel she would give me a splint to wear at night. I said I've already got that. She also mentioned Lyrica and when I told her I'd only heard bad things from people who have taken it, she said she had seen good results. Since I don't really trust doctors and I definitely don't trust pharmaceutical companies, and I do believe real people stories, I am not going to go that route. It's bad enough I'm taking Mobic now - though I really need to remember to take it every day, I think it's a subconscious thing that I forget it. I told her I would prefer non-medicated ways to treat whatever the issue is, and she did say PT could be something as well as massage therapy. Now that is something I can get on board with!

Of course when I returned to the office there were messages from my regular doctor. The results of the pee test came back and the lab claims that the bacteria in me would not be destroyed by the antibiotics I am on. So, since neither my doctor nor I wanted to try more drugs just for the sake of it, I have to go back on Friday for another pee test to see if the bacteria have been killed or if I really do need to start another course of antibiotics.

I'm starting to wonder how I have not ended up in a loony bin at this point.

I think that is all, but my memory has been crap. Yesterday the neurologist asked me if I had a doctor treating my FMS and I was like - on no, didn't like the last one and haven't got a new one. Daft git I am - of course I have a new one, the one that put me on Mobic. It was pretty embarrassing to have to tell her that I forgot.

Oh - never heard again from Dr. Kelly's office about rescheduling, and I'm in no rush to go back there. Still v. mad that they did not help me one bit in fighting the insurance about cancelling my PT. Also had an appointment w/ Dr. A scheduled for last Friday, but his office cancelled it, and I have not been bothered about ringing them back to reschedule either. I am so bored with all of this medical rubbish!

An accident waiting to happen -

That's what I am. It's incredible how accident prone I am. Sunday I was out w/ my little nephew, and to make a long story short, he was playing on a "child size" house at a farm, slipped across one of those slat type bridge things, hurt his elbow and was crying. So I ran up the "steps" - more like a plank with notches in it - to pick him up and as I did - WHACK! There went half my head into the v. low "child size" ceiling/roof. People kept asking if I was okay because it was so hard and loud. So now I'm slightly concussed. I took off from work yesterday because it hurt to just go a few feet from the bed to the loo. Still sore when I move, so trying to take it relatively easy, but still - at work you are on the computer. I'm not meant to do too much reading or watch too much telly, but I'm sort of stuck here at the office. I'm frustrated as well as I can't do any real physical activity until this swelling goes down. Nope, didn't go to a doctor. The last time I had a concussion - which was definitely worse than this one - I went to the doctors, they examined me, had me do a CT scan, and nothing showed up. I'm so over seeing doctors this year that I am just sorting myself out. There's really nothing they can do anyway. Hopefully it doesn't take as long as last time to wear off, I believe it was about 6 weeks or so.

As for the hips, they've not been happy. I thought I packed my Mobic from the office to go to the island on Friday, but it wasn't in my bag. I figured I must have left it here in the office by accident, but it's no where to be found. I hope it wasn't nicked. The hips are definitely missing the drugs and the pool. I have more Mobic at home but I can't really do much about the pool, so praying for a v. quick recovery.

weekly update

Last Saturday was lovely, I had a nice long lie in and then did nothing all day except make pancakes! I hadn't had a day like that in ages and it was just what I needed. Sunday I went to the pool and then my parents came in for a bit. The brought in this neck massage thingy I had gotten a few years ago and I've been using it to try to loosen up the knots in my neck. It seems to help a bit, though I'm still tight and also getting the pins and needles down the arm.

I went to Dr. Meng, the rheumatologist on Monday for my three month check-up. She feels I should increase the Mobic and take more Tylenol. I told her that the Mobic is irritating my stomach even with the acid-reflux meds, but she still seems to think I should do it even for a little bit. I'm very weary though. I rang up the insurance company as well to ask what I could do about getting to see the chiro again. They gave me the run around saying that I should have the chiro call to speak to their clinical one and explain the whole situation. I asked his office to do that and haven't heard back so don't know if they did. I will try again on Monday and see where to go from there.

Tuesday I went to the pool and had a good workout. Wednesday night I destroyed my body. I went to see Aimee Mann, who was fab, but it was standing room only and by the end of the night I thought my body was going to break apart into pieces, especially my hips and back. That and very little sleep left me a bit funky yesterday, so I did not go to the pool. I just had no energy so went home and relaxed - just what I needed. My left hip is still pretty miserable right now but at least the right one (touch wood) seems to be okay. And thankfully I've remembered to make the Mobic this week.

Tonight I am going to the island for the weekend. Staying at my brothers tonight and tomorrow my SIL and I will take my favourite boys to the beach, so long as the weather is good. Fingers crossed, it's not looking good at the moment.

August looks pretty laid back which is good. I will start in earnest my gym visits again next week. I just finished the required 50 for the 6 months to get reimbursed from the insurance company, and get to start the next six months on Sunday. I am going to get every cent from them especially since they won't pay for my PT or chiro now.

Happily I found out I have 13 days left to take before the end of the year. 2 are automatically put aside for Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur, and so it's really 11. I am looking forward to going to Holland in October or November to stay with my good friend who is having a baby this month. (I am voting for the 26th even though it's a week after her due date! :-) ) After that 6 days left to figure out what to do with. Yay!

Of course I just said the right hip was being good and it's just started a lovely stabbing pain! Argh!

Still haven't heard from Dr. Kelly's office after they left that message to cancel my last appointment. Since I'm so sick of doctors I'm waiting to see how long it takes them to realise they've not seen me for a follow-up in ages. I am definitely doctored out! I so wish I had a somewhat "normal" body! I'm so over this humpty dumpty thing.

Post-op

I had my post-op for the fistulotomy today and thankfully the doctor said it looks well and is healing well. What a relief! He said he was sorry he couldn't do anything for the pain, but it's such a sensitive area that that is what happens. Great news is that he said I could go swimming. He said it might burn at first, but heck, it's already doing that, so why not? Just wanted to add a fabulous tip I picked up from some reading on the internet. After you do your sitz bath or shower, use the hair dryer on cold and low to make sure that area is dry. I started doing this the second or third say after surgery and it made the wound actually feel good by stopping the stabbing, burning pain - if only when the dryer was on, plus kept the wound dry. As we well know a moist wound doesn't heal very quickly. Wish I could remember where I got this tip so I could thank the person!)

Very excited to go see "Kicking a Dead Horse" tonight. It's the new Sam Shepard at the Public Theatre with Stephen Rea. Thankfully it's only 70 minutes long so I am hoping my bum can handle that. Going to dinner at Five Points first. Can't remember if I've been there or not, so it shall be a surprise!

My hip is still achy, but now that I can get back to doing some PT I am hoping that will help. And I am finally remembering to take the Mobic again.

Weekend and 38 wk post-op update

I suppose it would help if I remembered to take those bloody Mobic pills! Last night I was lying in bed, wondering why my hips hurt so much. Yes I over did it this weekend, but they were really achy. Then I realised I hadn't taken a pill all weekend, possibly even including Friday. Oops. What's that saying, G-d helps those that help themselves? I have been pretty good except for the last few days, and yes I just took one now after my brecky.

My lovely wound had been behaving for a couple of days and then yesterday I woke up and it was bleeding a lot. I won't gross you out, but it was a gross day dealing with it. Even so I took my lazy bum to the pool. I figured I would do a test run to see if I would be able to do this after surgery, since the doctor said it should be okay. It felt great to exercise and be back in the pool - it's been 4 weeks and I definitely need to keep up my muscles in my legs. I don't want any backsliding with my hip "progress". I did a little over half an hour, then got kicked out because there was some kiddie party.

My right hand/wrist has been a wreck lately, but did sleep with the splint last night so hopefully it will make some sort of difference for the better. I really can't possibly think about hand surgery right now with everything else going on! 11 days till surgery. Ugh.

Break time!

At least I'm hoping it is. I so need to be able to just relax and not have any nutty things go on for a bit. My hip is not agreeing with this thought though and has decided to become quite achy the last few days, even with my taking the Mobic. Hopefully it cheers up soon and the weather (touch wood) will be brill on my trip. My wrist is in cahoots with my hip, so I did bring my splint to wear at night again and I am hoping that will teach it to behave! I won't mention my right shoulder, it's decided for an encore! But I have brought my arsenal of drugs. I've left them in their prescription containers just in case security things I'm a drug dealer!
Leaving the office in about an hour and cannot wait.
Yay!

PS - I sent in my letters of appeal to the state and Oxford, registered mail. Please pray they work and I get more PT!!!!!!!

if it's not one thing...

well, it's actually many. I've changed the quote.

Saturday I was feeling okay, weather was a bit hit or miss, and I took it easy. I had decided I would go to the pool on Sunday as it seems slightly less insane than on Saturdays. I also had plans to go out with some friends to Uncle Nicks - a must - for the flaming cheese! It was great! We ordered a bunch of starters and some wine and watched lots of flaming cheese! After we went next door to a bar that makes pretty damn strong drinks. This is a dangerous thing, but a fun one too! I'll just leave it at that. It was a great distraction from my pain though, as I barely knew what was bothering me! Gotta love that!

Sunday I went to the pool and had a good workout, pushed it a bit. After some lunch I went to sit in Central Park for a while, it was so beautiful out. My favourite weather, not too hot, not too cool - just right! I was feeling pretty good but still took the bus from my flat to the park, but I did end up walking home. I've been a bit sore since (yes even remembering to take my Mobic) so think I might have overdone it a bit. But still, I feel like I have to make some progress and not just do the same things all the time.

Monday was a pretty good day, weather lovely and I was even able to stand for a bit when I met my friend Stan out for drinks. I was still v. happy when the girl next to me finally left so I could nick her bar stool. :-) Yesterday did the pool again and hips were definitely not happy after, so I made sure to ice them both when I got home. I have to say that my back is still tight and my neck feels like there's a pinched nerve in there. I am thinking it's related to the arm exercises I've been doing in the pool. Tomorrow at my massage/chiro I will ask him to address that area.

Don't even get me started on my hand/wrist. It was hurting so much last night I put a lido patch on under my splint. Thankfully that worked so I didn't have the pain all night, but now it's back to hurting, plus I'm having shooting pains up and down the arm. Such fun. Have I mentioned how much I DO NOT want to have another hand surgery?

Anyway, for the most part, I've been good. I've slept well the last two nights (with assistance) but who cares, it feels great to sleep through the night! And I am off on holiday in two weeks so all is good!

Post - weekend update

Today I feel horrid. The weather is horrid. Today is the first day in a while that I am slightly gimpy with the right hip. I shouldn't really be complaining though. I didn't sleep last night, and I also realised that I had forgotten to take the Mobic on Saturday and Sunday. Oops. Friday night I was out, and didn't get to sleep till late, and same as Saturday. Why is it no matter how exhausted I am I just can't sleep? Drives me nuts.

I walked quite a bit on Saturday, trying to see how I would do. I thought I did pretty well for the amount of walking I did. I pushed myself at the pool yesterday. Have been trying to walk faster and also added arm exercises. My back and shoulders are so sore today. I don't mind being a bit sore, just wish my whole body didn't ache so much today. Sadly I don't think there is one part of me that doesn't hurt. Oh well, tomorrow is another day.

I had totally forgotten I had an appointment with the rheumatologist today. Thankfully I looked in my calendar and saw it. I hope she doesn't get mad that I am still only taking one Mobic per day. I just don't see the reason to take two as one is destroying my stomach, and I've been taking two acid-reflux pills a day to try to help. I also hope she doesn't examine me physically, because if someone touched me right now I might have to kill them. Ok, maybe not kill - permanently maim perhaps?

I am going to the NYPL tonight for another function. A friend invited me to some readings that are to be done by Ethan Hawke and others. I'm not a huge EH fan, but he was decent in "The Coast of Utopia" last year. Should be good though I hope I'm feeling better before that. Perhaps I can get a nap squeezed in somehow.

My right hand/wrist is a mess - even with wearing this bloody splint every night. I am dreading the thought of surgery - I know I've probably said this before - but will put it off as long as possible. I'm so over the medical profession.

I sent an email to the PT people today to see if they a) did ever get the letter off, b) if the insurance co actually received it this time and c) if there was anything else they suggest doing in the pool. Hopefully I will hear back with some (touch wood) good news.

???

My left hip is KILLING me today. I realised at the end of yesterday that I'd forgotten to take the Mobic. But can it REALLY lose the effect in a days time? Either that or I slept in a really bizarre position - which has been known to happen.
I'm baffled.

Thankfully the right isn't too bad, just a bit achy, but think it was from wearing high heels yesterday? Perhaps that's why the left is not happy either? Well, going to the heated PT pool tonight and we'll see how that goes.

It's also my day for the chiro/massage dr - sooooo happy about that!

Four weeks till my holiday!!! I can't wait! (I'm not counting down or anything ;-) )

Overdid it a bit.

I need a week to recover from this past weekend. I guess it wouldn't have been so bad if I had actually slept for the last week, but that didn't seem to be in the program. Regardless, I love doing Seder so it was all worth it. Also, it was my own fault going out on Friday night and indulging in all sorts of craziness, but that also was worth it :-)

So, Saturday night/v. early Sunday am I went to bed exhausted, but still couldn't fall asleep for ages. Then I woke up at 8.45am yesterday! I had a busy and tiring day digging through lots of boxes in my parents basement looking for binders of negatives I had. Sure enough there was one box I left out because the writing on it implied it had nothing to do with me. I decided to go back down there and dig through there - and sure enough all of my negs were there! Never fails, everything is always in the last place you look! Quite a workout though and my right shoulder is especially not happy. But again, worth it!

Yesterday I threw on a lidocaine patch on the right hip because all the standing and cooking over the weekend and cleaning all last week made it a v. unhappy camper. It definitely helped get me through the rest of the night though. Seder at my parents was fun too and didn't get home till about half eleven. I think I was overtired as I again had trouble sleeping. Will sort that out tonight with a lovely pill and praying it works so I can sleep through the night. Still taking only one 7.5mg of Mobic a day, but have had to up the dosage on my acid reflux meds as the Mobic is playing havoc with my stomach.

So, even though I pushed my body to the limits this weekend, and I'm pretty damned achy and in pain, I'm not nearly as bad w/ the hip as I'd have thought. Extremely happy about that. Perhaps not having PT to go to is helping more than doing it? I've still been doing the pool, and will have to pick up again this week what I skipped last week for sheer lack of time and energy. But tomorrow. Today is a rest day, well, other than having to be at work :-)

Not sure

about what this medicine is doing. Yesterday I was feeling very good. Walked a lot and wasn't even in pain afterwards. Then today I got to work and started feeling pretty achy all over again. I'm very confused as to what the cause is. It's lovely out and warm, though I think it may rain tomorrow, and it did last night, so that's always a possibility. Plus I didn't sleep too well. We shall see. I have been taking the Mobic 7.5mg 1x/day and a 500mg Tylenol in the afternoon as directed. Still not keen on upping the dosage of either until I have reached the two week mark, that's how long the doctor said it takes to really work. I am going to the pool after work so will see how that goes.

I sent the PT people an email on the 7th asking if they'd sent the letter to my insurance company but still haven't heard anything back from them. Hmph!

But on the brighter side of life - I am discovering that some of my trousers that hadn't been fitting last year are now fitting - some good comes out of everything! :-)

So far...

I did take a pill yesterday. I took one, and only one. Then I took a Tylenol later. One of those only as well. I don't believe in this "more is better" theory with drugs. Then again, I hate drugs. Well, except when they shoot me up post-up with Demerol and my lidocaine patches. There has to be an exception to everything, right?

Anyway, felt so-so this weekend. Achy but not as bad as last Wed-Fri. My shoulder has been popping around like it was, well, I can't really compare it to anything. Nothing else I know quite pops like it does. Sleep has been crap, even with the magic pills. I am afraid to think that they've stopped working. Then again I've a lot on my mind with this website design stuff and trying to locate all my negs from university. Where could they have gone? I am going to dig up my mothers basement next week when I'm home. Even though I've looked everywhere I could think of, I will have to do it again. Stress! Anyway, getting back to el crappo body. Today achy, random knee, hip, hand alternating but could be the weather/sleep/stress combo. I did take another Mobic today, and will take one Tylenol in a bit.

Went to the gym at lunch and did 20 minutes on the bike, no tension, and then 30 leg presses with just 30lbs. I should go ice, totally forgot to when I got back. So we will see how that goes. Have been doing the bridges with the ball at home, and going to the pool (well, went on Friday and didn't make it over the weekend, but will go tomorrow.)

Still looking for a new body if anyone sees any for sale... :-)

update

Rang the rheumatologist Dr. Meng yesterday and she thinks that the Mobic is not causing more pain, and I should DOUBLE the dosage. I am a bit weary about this but will try it. Also to take 1000mg of Tylenol every day. I am turning into a druggie. She was helpful with the insurance appeal and wrote a good letter to them, which I forwarded to my S at the PT office to include. I also forwarded the letter to Dr. Kelly's office for them to keep on file in case the insurance co contacts them, and also to show them what they could have written. I also asked him where the insurance co got the idea my strength was 4/5. Haven't heard back yet.

That's it for now because I feel like my body has been run over by 10 mack trucks and I can barely move. If only I could stay home today. Or move to a warm, dry climate. That is getting more and more appealing by the second.

Topsy-Turvy

I'm not sure what is going on but my body is screaming at me and usually that's when the weather goes all icky. But the weather isn't meant to go all icky till Friday. I am wondering if it is this new medication I'm taking? I have been feeling achy since I woke up today.

Insurance companies

On Friday I heard from my PT office that they received a letter denying me future PT for my hip. It was sent to them, it's 5 days later and I still haven't received anything directly. They claim my strength is 4/5 (I'd love to know where they got that one from) and that I've "plateaued" so PT is not something I should do, it's "not medically necessary". I was a bit peeved at my PT's office as they just left a message telling me about the letter, and that I should contact them about fees for the future, and as an afterthought mentioned appealing, as if that was something I shouldn't even consider. Not quite. I'll be appealing any which way I can. I suppose I can understand how some pencil pusher in a building with no medical experience can assume that I've not been progressing because he looks at his list he's been given and doesn't take into consideration the actual person and all of their medical issues. But it's still not right or justified.

My PT said he'd submit an appeal and that I should get a note from the rheumatologist (sent her a fax and am awaiting a reply). I asked Dr. Kelly's office but was told that their letters for this do not apply (???) and they can't do anything "legal". Other ideas were mentioned but I won't even consider them except as a last resort. This is so bloody frustrating!

I've been going to the pool three times a week and since I didn't go to PT yesterday, I went home and did some with my exercise ball and weights. I will have to go to the gym for the bike and leg press. I was meant to go the pool today but was invited to an event at the New York Public Library. Very excited as I love libraries, books, anything like that really.

Other than all this stress, the weather is making me pretty achy, as well as my erratic sleep habits. I have been taking the Mobic since Saturday. One pill (7.5mg) once a day. I haven't felt any difference at all yet, but it's still early. I have an appointment next week to see my internist about the acid-reflux meds. So not happy about that but I don't have a choice, at least for the moment.